It began with a crack I couldn’t explain; subtle at first, then splitting me wide. I didn’t know it then, but I was in the early stages of a shamanic initiation. It came through dreams, physical symptoms, and a trembling sense that something ancient was stirring in my bones. Trauma cracked me open. Illness hollowed me out. I had waves of ecstasy so intense I searched online if it could be the symptom of a brain tumour.